Follow your heart, not the crowds

Many years ago, when I first moved away from my hometown, I decided to study Kinesiology. For approximately three and a half years I spent one weekend a month and every Monday, in class. I also studied from home and with other students.

As I reached the end of the third year, I was a different person. You see, Kinesiology has a way of helping you heal, shift subconscious blocks and deepen your sense of self.  It is by far, one of the most potent healing tools I’ve ever experienced.

As I began my fourth year of study, I could feel I wasn’t fully aligned with where my life was heading.  I spoke with Andy and mentioned I didn’t know if I wanted to continue the studies and I also spoke to a couple of friends. I wrote the pros and cons and the more I thought about whether to stay or leave, the more confused I felt.

I didn’t realise at the time, how much I had attached to ‘becoming a kinesiologist’. The idea of completing a course and building a business gave me a huge amount of confidence, it gave me an identity, something the ego loves. 

Then there were the thoughts about ‘what would people think and I’d look like a failure etc’ not to mention the amazing people, who had taken care of my children while I studied. What would they think? My mum had been travelling from Dargaville to come and help me, which I was so grateful for. How could I now turn around and say, I’ve decided not to study Kinesiology anymore. The guilt this ignited in me, was overwhelming.

So, I continued to go to class and I also continued to feel my heart and soul wither. One day after attending class, where my brain felt like mush and my heart felt tender, a couple of my classmates and I went to a café opposite the University. We sat outside at a table and all of a sudden, a bunch of students began singing just down the path from us. I was instantly mesmerised by the way they sang wholeheartedly. They didn’t care what others thought. They didn’t play small. They were simply doing what made them incredibly happy. I knew that there was no coincidence that we’d gone to that café and sat in that seat and seen those people sing so joyously. I knew they had a message for me; I could feel it throughout my body. ‘Do what makes your heart sing!’

So that evening when I sat down with Andy, I mentioned that I’d decided to let my kinesiology studies go and continue down a path which lit me up more. I also phoned my Mum and let her know. She listened and if she was disappointed, I couldn’t tell. She simply said something along the lines of, do what makes you happy. What I realised as I told my loved ones, was that it was me that had to be happy with my decisions, not anyone else.

After leaving my Kinesiology studies, I went on to study Life Coaching, which was another 3 years of part-time study. I felt so alive and inspired as I learnt these new teachings and began to coach people all those years ago. 

When I look back, I know the Kinesiology studies were my pilgrimage, where I faced many of my demons, let go, healed, and transformed and my coaching, is where I can now support others to discover what makes them deeply satisfied and build the courage to make it happen. 

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